(gap: 2s) Over the past year, as the world has shifted and reshaped itself during the Covid “reduction”—which, as we all know, is now on the rise again—I’ve found myself traveling more than I ever expected. These journeys, often to see old friends or distant relatives, have become a patchwork of stories and confessions, the kind that only surface when the world feels uncertain and memories are stirred by the quiet of lockdowns and the hum of empty roads. (short pause) I’ve collected anecdotes, fragments of lives, and sometimes, secrets that have lain dormant for decades.
One story stands out—a woman, just a few years my senior, who confided in me about her late husband. After his passing, she discovered several notebooks, each filled with hundreds of drawings: boys being spanked, scenes rendered with a detail that suggested both fascination and secrecy. She now wonders, with a mixture of regret and curiosity, whether her husband had been a closeted gay man all along. The revelation has left her with more questions than answers, and I could sense the weight of her uncertainty as she spoke.
Sexual preferences are, of course, deeply personal—rarely the sort of thing one would bring up in casual conversation, and certainly not something I’d usually mention here. But in this context, it feels relevant. Still, I advised her gently: unless there is other evidence, it may not be fair to assume her husband’s sexuality based solely on those drawings. Human interests, especially those formed in childhood or adolescence, are complex and often defy easy categorization.
I remember, years ago, when I first joined the Forum—a gathering place for those of us with memories and questions about school discipline. Back then, the community was a tapestry of voices, mostly men, many of whom, like myself, were fascinated by stories of girls being subjected to SCP. There was a smaller, but still notable, group of men interested in boys being punished by female teachers, or even in recalling their own experiences of such punishments. The conversations were candid, sometimes confessional, and always tinged with the nostalgia of a bygone era.
The Forum itself was a reflection of its time. Many contributors were shaped by the strict, post-war British school system—where discipline was both a tool and a ritual, and where the slipper or cane was as much a symbol of authority as the headmistress’s stern gaze. I recall one contributor, “John,” who described in vivid detail the anxiety and anticipation that would build before a class punishment. He remembered the hush that fell over the room, the way the sunlight caught the dust motes as the teacher reached for the slipper, and the strange mix of fear and pride that followed.
Today, the Forum has changed. Many of those early voices have faded away, replaced by a new generation—again, mostly men—whose interests seem to have shifted. Now, the majority are drawn to stories of boys being subjected to CP, often at the hands of other males. Some share their own memories, others recount tales passed down by friends or siblings. The tone is different, perhaps more introspective, but the fascination remains.
I don’t think I’d be unfair in saying that these new contributors are, by and large, interested in the experiences of boys—either their own, or those of their contemporaries. There’s a recurring theme: the desire to understand, to process, and sometimes to relive those moments of discipline, whether as a source of shame, pride, or simply curiosity.
When it comes to boys being punished by female teachers—or the fantasy of having been caned by a female prefect—I find myself almost alone in my particular interest. (short pause) It’s as if I’m a lone voice, echoing in a vast wilderness of shifting memories and changing social norms.
But I must emphasize: it would be a mistake to assume that an interest in boys being subjected to CP, especially when administered by other males, is an indicator of sexuality. I would be absolutely astonished if that were the case! The motivations are far more nuanced, shaped by the social dynamics of the time, the rituals of school life, and the complex interplay of authority, rebellion, and belonging.
For women who experienced SCP, the memories are often framed as punishment—sometimes fair, sometimes not, and occasionally tinged with the suspicion that there was a sexual undertone. But rarely, if ever, is it something to be proud of, or a source of status among peers. I recall a contributor named “Susan,” who wrote about the humiliation she felt after being slippered in front of her classmates. She described the burning shame, the whispered gossip, and the way it lingered long after the marks had faded.
For boys, however, the experience could be very different. Being subjected to CP—especially in front of others—was sometimes seen as a badge of honour, a rite of passage. There was a strange camaraderie in comparing stories: who had been whacked, how hard, and by whom. Peer esteem, self-esteem, even the pecking order of the playground could hinge on these details. I remember “David,” another Forum regular, who recounted how he and his friends would boast about their punishments, each trying to outdo the other with tales of stoicism and bravado.
I repeat: it’s simply not accurate to draw conclusions about sexuality from an interest in these stories. The emotional impact, the social dynamics, and the personal reflections are far more complicated than that.
And yet, there are always exceptions. While most women I’ve spoken to recall SCP as a source of embarrassment or resentment, there are those rare individuals who saw it differently. One such exception was “B,” a girl I witnessed being slippered in class when she was seven or eight. Three years later, during a school assembly, the headmistress announced that she had been “forced to chastise” a girl for repeated misconduct. We were all sitting on the floor at the back of the hall, and B turned to her neighbour and said, with unmistakable pride, “that’s what I got.” In that moment, she seemed to wear her punishment as a badge of honour, expecting her status to be elevated among her peers.
These stories—woven through the fabric of post-war Britain, shaped by the values and anxieties of the era—remind me how complex and deeply personal our memories of childhood discipline can be. They are not just about pain or shame, but about identity, belonging, and the ways we make sense of authority and rebellion. (pause) As I continue to travel and listen, I am struck by how these echoes of the past still shape us, long after the slipper has been put away and the school bell has rung for the last time.
